Thursday, November 25, 2010

To Meow Or Not To Meow

I want a cat. Wantwantwantwantwant. Damned this, I soon can't stand it anymore. How can people live their entire lives without cats? I can't relax without a cat. My head won't shut up. It's better with something small and furry warming my stomach and poking holes in me with very sharp claws, very very carefully as if testing how many holes can be made before stomach-warming privileges are revoked. Something that blinks lazily at me as if saying, "you're being very silly who aren't a cat", and meows demandingly at the fridge as if saying "although you're silly I still need you for operating this unhelpful food-machine".

Someone who's mine, whose trust I'll have to win and whose companionship I need to earn. Someone I have to observe very carefully to adjust perfectly into sync with. Someone who will learn all my little invisible signs, so I can lie to my heart's content; it won't matter. Someone who will smile to itself lazily while I ramble on about the fortunes and misfortunes of life, and wait for me to sit down on the sofa so it can take possession of my lap, because it knows that the words isn't the important thing. The important thing is waking up breathing together, is my heartbeats echoing into its chest and its echoing into my hand, is being alive. Together. Someone to be the solid center of my life; my pivot point.

Cats are so much more than just cats. Not all of them, I suppose. I suppose I met the love of my life way too early, and had to let him go way too early. But maybe there's another one out there. Another perfect host for my cat-symbiotism.

8 comments:

Riklurt said...

Crazy cat lady, you so crazy.

I half-envy, half-despise this type of bond, because it's something I just can't wrap my head around. Animals, of every kind, are as mysterious to me as computers are to old people. Confusing, vaguely frightening, and somehow spellbinding all these young'uns.

Yeonni said...

I suppose "as computers are to old people" is a very good parallel. Once you get enough experience you'll probably "get" it. If you want to. But animals are like grumpy old men :p You have to figure out what they're thinking because they won't just tell you with a million words, but on the other hand once you do it feels like you have a special bond :)

Sara said...

Oh I want a cat tooooo!!!!

Nallenon said...

I'm about 50% "Yes, I agree with what you just said" and 50% "Wow, you're really crazy".

ShadoWolf said...

I want a cat too but as things are now it would've to be an indoor cat and that just feels so wrong somehow...I couldn't bare to watch all that wonderful free spirited wilderness in their eyes die away, trapped indoors like a lion in a cage, like a royal hostage. They deserve better.

I don't think you're crazy though. A crazy cat lady to me is some filthy old hag with 39 inbreed cats closed up in some ramshackle house and now and then suspiciously peeking out through dirty windows from behing shredded old curtains...I just can't picture you that way ;)

Nallenon said...

No, Crazy Cat Lady would be the bad kind of crazy, this is more of the good kind of crazy.

Kat said...

No thank you, helpful bot, I do not want new shoes. Now; tell me why you haven't gotten us a cat? Why are you keeping me from that furry little friend of ours? I demand an explanation!

The reason you are not met by happy tail-wagging dog every morning is because I can't afford it. That's the only reason I haven't gotten one :(

Yeonni said...

Well... lack of cat is; partly monetary, but not verily, mostly it's that I don't know what to do with the furry friend over Christmas and summer.