Saw this movie long ago, and didn't quite like it. Rewatched it recently because I wanted to make sure I wasn't just in a bad mood that day and didn't give it a decent shot.
And um. Let's get the feminist crap out of the way. Set aside the idea that a strong female lead is a girl *super*-doted on by her man-child father, who gets reasonably sporty and doesn't want to marry whichever dude. Also that the only women in here are A) main character, B) her mother who handles all the paperwork with calm feminine grace and acts like her husband's mother, and C) servants who exclusively scream and run away, carry cloth and hang out in the kitchen. And all men are brainless cavemen man-children or worse (the only point where male characters get to be any deeper than a pizza plate is when the clan heirs agree with Merida's request that they should all get to choose their partner). Also lose any notion that this would be an adventure movie similar to adventure movies with reasonably sporty boys as main characters. Each time Merida shoots her bow at a live target, it does absolutely nothing, and I hope you don't imagine she's the one who defeats the bad guy. Welcome helpless heroine.
Alright then, on to review. This script is, let's say, all over the place. There's several stories going on a once here, and sure that's fine, but at least one is just forcefully shoved into random dialogue for the first part, and then provides a timely easy way out from the final confrontation. The focus seems scattered, with sequences of scenery and beautiful shots that look more like graphic showing-off than any form of story exposition. I will expand on these two problems below.
1) Script. My favorite piece of writing here that for me comes to symbolize this movie is an early exchange between Merida and her mother. Slightly paraphrased, but far less than you might think, Merida goes to her mother and says "why do I have to marry", and her mother responds by saying "long ago there was a kingdom where one son wasn't satisfied with sharing with his brothers and the kingdom fell". End of conversation.
2) Nature Photography. In Brave, you get a long sequence of Merida shooting arrows from her horse and climbing a mountain to drink some water, to later tell her father that she did, and he goes "hey good job", and mom goes "sigh". In Pocahontas, you get not only the text of a song to progress the story while she and John Smith frolics in the forest, but what they do while frolicking also symbolizes how she brings him to see the beauty of nature and taking him deep into the forest where only the natives go, forming a bond between their characters over sped-up time. Compared to the much more story-progressing sequence of Merida playing in the river with her mother, the initial sequence of climbing the mountain is very near pointless. And there's more of these random shots of "forest" that fails to establish any sense of progress or wonder or setting beyond "forest".
One could easily say that 2 is a consequence of 1 (as in bad scripts, not greedy brothers). In How To Train Your Dragon, you very quickly get a feeling that the conflict between the boy and his father is about their difference in base personality and skill; the boy is an inventor, the father a hands-on warrior. But in Brave, the conflicts are scattered. Is it about Merida being too "boyish"? Too rash? Too selfish? Too childish? About her mother being too responsible, stuck-up, too traditional, too perfectionist? For much of it, it just seems to be a woman shouting "I want!" and a girl shouting "I don't want!", for a confusing number of reasons. Is Merida opposed to the marriage because it will limit her in any way? Will she not be allowed to shoot arrows or frolic in the forest when she's married? Or is she opposed to the duties? But surely she won't be queen until the old is dead, no? She hasn't met the boys before she starts protesting, so clearly she's already set up the stop sign irrespective of their personalities. Is she opposed to it solely because her mother tells her to?
I could ask, but the answer is apparently "long ago there was a kingdom where one son wasn't satisfied with sharing with his brothers and the kingdom fell", but I don't feel like cleaning up chessboard pieces, since neat perfectionist mother gets a touch of major drama queen whenever she tells that story. Woo character consistency.
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Monday, November 24, 2014
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Pony Aliens
This:
Now that I have your attention, that is indeed a My Little Pony gone Alien.
There's an awesome artist doing pony versions of popular culture
figures, ranging from Batman to Marilyn Monroe, go check out
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Movie Review: X-Men First Class
Saw X-Men First Class and, boy, do I like it better than those other three X-Men movies... actually, let's forget all about those and pretend they never existed. For all intents and purposes this will vastly improve your quality of life, I promise. It still has its flaws and stuff, but this movie actually manages to feel more like the comics, which is good. It wouldn't be impressive, only to expect, if it weren't for those three non-existing movies that you've forgotten that had directors that knew nothing about the comics. Possibly the first one is watchable, if it existed. So in the shadow of things that do not exist, this movie is impressive. On its own, it's merely a good action movie, that I enjoyed watching. Also because the actors don't suck and actually fit their respective characters, as opposed to... okay I'll stop talking about things you're trying to forget.
I was hesitant at first. Through the first 20-30 minutes I was basically holding my breath, watching the movie do a delicate balance act without safety net where I expected it to fall off and land on its face, and saw its feet trembling. What kept it standing was Kevin Bacon and the Angel of Hope. Then it stabilizes, pretty much as soon as Charles and Eric meet. The two of them balance out like the long stick rope walkers have. Suddenly you have cool X-Men with cool powers that they actually use in sensible and intuitive ways (such as Eric using his body and magnetic powers to press Charles against the floor of the plane when it goes down), as well as character depth (the big one of course being the clash of experience, upbringing, nature and idealism between Charles and Eric - something both actors manage to convey with feeling). And even humor, that doesn't feel milked out of a cow's ass. Woo. Since everything is new and raw to the characters as well it's a lot easier to take in and understand than Magneto and Professor X shouting "you never understood anything" at each other forty years into the future.
*SPOILER WARNING*
A part of my approval might lay with the choices of mutants to appear. Banshee, Havok, Angel (the wasp girl not the bird guy), Emma Frost... they're all cool people, who opposed to people like Phoenix and Wolverine carry a little less iconic baggage which makes them easier to portray and let people focus on who they are rather than who they think they should be. The one thing I dislike about the casting is that they do the good old "only the black guy dies" thing, which feels very old by now, and especially since the black guy in question is a fairly obscure character - taken in only to have a black guy? Being also a noble character with interesting powers, I believe Darwin deserved a better cinematic fate. Rather do what you want and forget about token people. As an Asian, I can just as well go "where's my token Asian person?". Eventually people like that would control your movie. Considering this is set in the '60s, it'd be neither offensive nor unrealistic to have an all-caucasian cast.
*SPOILER OVER :D*
Summary:
This movie could also be called:
Kevin Bacon and the Mildly Annoying Good Guys - but stealing the show is very in character for Sebastian Shaw; it's pretty much been his character weakness all along :D
How Magneto Got His Silly Helmet - and just to be sure he sillifies the reasonably unsilly helmet as soon as he gets it.
But what I really want to call this movie is:
Better.
I was hesitant at first. Through the first 20-30 minutes I was basically holding my breath, watching the movie do a delicate balance act without safety net where I expected it to fall off and land on its face, and saw its feet trembling. What kept it standing was Kevin Bacon and the Angel of Hope. Then it stabilizes, pretty much as soon as Charles and Eric meet. The two of them balance out like the long stick rope walkers have. Suddenly you have cool X-Men with cool powers that they actually use in sensible and intuitive ways (such as Eric using his body and magnetic powers to press Charles against the floor of the plane when it goes down), as well as character depth (the big one of course being the clash of experience, upbringing, nature and idealism between Charles and Eric - something both actors manage to convey with feeling). And even humor, that doesn't feel milked out of a cow's ass. Woo. Since everything is new and raw to the characters as well it's a lot easier to take in and understand than Magneto and Professor X shouting "you never understood anything" at each other forty years into the future.
*SPOILER WARNING*
A part of my approval might lay with the choices of mutants to appear. Banshee, Havok, Angel (the wasp girl not the bird guy), Emma Frost... they're all cool people, who opposed to people like Phoenix and Wolverine carry a little less iconic baggage which makes them easier to portray and let people focus on who they are rather than who they think they should be. The one thing I dislike about the casting is that they do the good old "only the black guy dies" thing, which feels very old by now, and especially since the black guy in question is a fairly obscure character - taken in only to have a black guy? Being also a noble character with interesting powers, I believe Darwin deserved a better cinematic fate. Rather do what you want and forget about token people. As an Asian, I can just as well go "where's my token Asian person?". Eventually people like that would control your movie. Considering this is set in the '60s, it'd be neither offensive nor unrealistic to have an all-caucasian cast.
*SPOILER OVER :D*
Summary:
This movie could also be called:
Kevin Bacon and the Mildly Annoying Good Guys - but stealing the show is very in character for Sebastian Shaw; it's pretty much been his character weakness all along :D
How Magneto Got His Silly Helmet - and just to be sure he sillifies the reasonably unsilly helmet as soon as he gets it.
But what I really want to call this movie is:
Better.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Movie Review: Ninja Assassin
Welcome to the movie review of Ninja Assassin, also known as "A 90 Minute Study of Rain's Abs".
Let me make something clear first; this is not a deep story movie, and those who expected it to be are in for a well-deserved disappointment. However with decent acting and beautiful filming, it flies safely over the dark abyss of porn-quality. Some official or other starts digging into the truth behind a rumor of a secret ninja organization. So we leave the story, because it's standard, and neither contributes greatly or ruins anything.
We have established that it's an action movie. It's also, obviously, a martial arts ninja movie. Let me make another thing clear: this is not a realistic movie. Those who expect that past the first five minutes are also in for a well-deserved disappointment. Ninjas move in darkness like in that horror movie called, oh right, Darkness, and obey the ninja trope of "the more ninjas in one place, the worse they get".
However, taking the movie at face value, I enjoyed the action a lot! Almost all of it is blade-based, very little fists or firearms, and they've done the most of it, with dark moody settings where the glimmering blades and the exaggeratedly red blood are the only focal points. Think Sin City and replace American noir with ninja manga dismemberment á la Blade of the Immortal. I think the stylistic yet semi-realistic violence balances between beauty and grotesqueness in a fascinating way, and I love the blade-on-a-chain weapon and the visual effects it produces.
The Rain (aka Jung Ji-Hoon) whose abs we study is a Korean actor/singer and the reason I saw this movie in the first place. While I openly admit bias, I think he really is a good actor, a better actor than singer, and he's gotten a few awards and remarks from high places. Obviously his acting is hardly put to the test here, but I think what keeps the story together and on level is the performance from him and the big boss, Shô Kosugi.
In summary: I greatly enjoyed watching this movie, and I think all the bad reviews are a little unfair. It's not trying to get the Nobel prize in philosophy, neither is it trying to accurately depict ninjas. I like it a great lot better than many other brainless action movies that have gotten a much more favorable reception. While watching it in complete darkness certainly helped, the way they played with shadows was exciting, and the style of the action as well as the acting quality were very positive surprises considering what I'd heard about it. Together with the added bonus of "A 90 Minute Study of Rain's Abs" (and trust me, heterosexual men, they are a bonus for you as well), it is hovering in the top50-borderlands of Totally Enjoyable Friday Night Movie.
PS. Also don't whine at that all the ninjas speak English. It falls under the "take at face value", together with "how the hell did they get armored vehicles from Europe into the Japanese mountains".
Let me make something clear first; this is not a deep story movie, and those who expected it to be are in for a well-deserved disappointment. However with decent acting and beautiful filming, it flies safely over the dark abyss of porn-quality. Some official or other starts digging into the truth behind a rumor of a secret ninja organization. So we leave the story, because it's standard, and neither contributes greatly or ruins anything.
We have established that it's an action movie. It's also, obviously, a martial arts ninja movie. Let me make another thing clear: this is not a realistic movie. Those who expect that past the first five minutes are also in for a well-deserved disappointment. Ninjas move in darkness like in that horror movie called, oh right, Darkness, and obey the ninja trope of "the more ninjas in one place, the worse they get".
However, taking the movie at face value, I enjoyed the action a lot! Almost all of it is blade-based, very little fists or firearms, and they've done the most of it, with dark moody settings where the glimmering blades and the exaggeratedly red blood are the only focal points. Think Sin City and replace American noir with ninja manga dismemberment á la Blade of the Immortal. I think the stylistic yet semi-realistic violence balances between beauty and grotesqueness in a fascinating way, and I love the blade-on-a-chain weapon and the visual effects it produces.
The Rain (aka Jung Ji-Hoon) whose abs we study is a Korean actor/singer and the reason I saw this movie in the first place. While I openly admit bias, I think he really is a good actor, a better actor than singer, and he's gotten a few awards and remarks from high places. Obviously his acting is hardly put to the test here, but I think what keeps the story together and on level is the performance from him and the big boss, Shô Kosugi.
In summary: I greatly enjoyed watching this movie, and I think all the bad reviews are a little unfair. It's not trying to get the Nobel prize in philosophy, neither is it trying to accurately depict ninjas. I like it a great lot better than many other brainless action movies that have gotten a much more favorable reception. While watching it in complete darkness certainly helped, the way they played with shadows was exciting, and the style of the action as well as the acting quality were very positive surprises considering what I'd heard about it. Together with the added bonus of "A 90 Minute Study of Rain's Abs" (and trust me, heterosexual men, they are a bonus for you as well), it is hovering in the top50-borderlands of Totally Enjoyable Friday Night Movie.
PS. Also don't whine at that all the ninjas speak English. It falls under the "take at face value", together with "how the hell did they get armored vehicles from Europe into the Japanese mountains".
Monday, September 26, 2011
Top50 Movies as of 2011
Finally my top 50 movies, although it's actually a top 48 because I kept two spots open in wait of watching Inception and Black Swan but haven't gotten around to it, and I have a feeling I've forgotten something. I also made a top9 because they set themselves so dramatically apart from the others, at least in my heart, that they clearly rank above the others. The other 39 are divided in rough genres to make it a little more manageable to read, but aside from the top9 being above the others (and roughly ranked against each other, I realize), there's no internal ranking. I guess I'll write some silly comments like you guys did ;)
I also want to point out that I didn't read your lists until now, because I didn't want to get last-minute infections from you that would ruin it :P the point was to share new things not echo each others, so that's how it is anyway.
TOP 9
The Big Blue - I cannot empathize enough the emotions this movie gave me. Fucking dangerous.
Leon - The love-at-first-sight meeting with Luc Besson and Jean Reno.
Oldboy - The whole movie is a bloody wonder, but that moment near the end hit me so damned hard.
Wall-E - Nicking in together with the Lion King, an instant classic that hits all the right notes.
The Lion King - In a sense my first meeting with concepts like honor, but most of all because I love Simba and Scar equally, which taught me so much.
District 9 - The best political movies are those that never feel like one.
Batman: The Dark Knight - We were all dancing around after leaving the cinema, so you know why.
Adam's Apples - Absurd, human and beautiful, a hidden Danish treasure ^^
Boondock Saints - If the stylish main characters don't win you over, the violence will :D
ANIMATED
How to train your Dragon - I also want a black beautiful cat-dragon! Gimme!
Ratatouille - Not sure why tbh but I love it.
FF7 Advent Children - Yes, actually, not just as a fan, but the visuals, the music, the composition, is great.
DRAMA / ROMANCE
Love Actually - In all honesty, basically the only romance movie you'll ever need.
Le Fabuleaux destin de Amelie du Montmartre - Had to write the whole title, because it feels just like the movie, ridiculous and perfect.
About Adam - Would love some opinions on this. It amused me greatly though.
Hard Candy - Surprised me at the time, and also of course star performance from Ellen Page.
The Merchant of Venice - Shakespeare! Amazing performance by Al Pacino as the Jew.
The King and the Clown / The King's Man - Korean historic drama, difficult but intriguing.
Postman to Heaven / Heaven's Postman - Fantastic visuals and charming story lifted this from just fan love of the actor to love of the movie itself.
Whale Rider - A slow but fierce story of a Maori girl fighting to fulfill her destiny despite her gender and the times around her.
Definitely Maybe - Charmed me despite going in with low expectations.
Ballad of Jack and Rose - I would never see it again, but it slowly, light as a breath, crept under your skin while watching.
Efter Bryllupet / After the Wedding - Touching and twisting.
Les amants du Point Neuf - One of those great movies you see only once because it hurts too much to watch.
Forrest Gump - Overwhelmingly cute and one of those happy success stories that doesn't make you barf.
The Fall - Because the act of telling a story can also be a story, and change the one who tells it.
Crash - Worth every award it's gotten.
HORROR
Cloverfield - Came into it not knowing anything, which was good. Got the proper surprise effect ;)
ACTION / THRILLER / SOMETHING
Kingdom of Heaven - Something about that whole honor and a man's gotta do crap that always works for me. Also Jeremy Irons and a cool king in a mask.
Once upon a time in Mexico - Like Boondock, it's an elegant mix of violence, style and humor.
Memento - Something of a token spot; yes it's good, yes it's innovative, we all heard it the first time.
V for Vendetta - Managing to keep decently close to the comic, while not feeling terribly much like one.
Inglorious Bastards - Not because of Brad Pitt, whom I hate in this movie, but because the script is fuckin' awesome.
Iron Man - Somewhat the same motivation as V for Vendetta; and R.D.Junior is ofc Stark. IRL. Really.
Pitch Black - Fantastic stylish sci-fi horror/action with a treasured absence of silly space-ships.
No Country for Old Men - This movie has balls.
300 - Love the visuals, even if I think they're already a little dated so you can "see the bluescreen".
The Good The Bad The Weird - Korean action movie with a lot of cool action and even a little plot.
Lock, Stock and 2 smoking barrels - Better than Snatch, IMO, in that it has more shooting ;)
History of Violence - Aside from the Hollywood touches that dirties it at times, it's a cute murderous story.
COMEDY
Easy A - The clever teen movie. Ooooh, was that a flying pig?
The Hangover - Hangs on just at my level of stupid humor.
Zombieland - Is so amusing it's criminal. Was that the second Emma Stone comedy? Look at that.
I'm A Cyborg but it's OK - Oldboy-director goes "I'ma do some random insane romance-comedy now", and it's just as great!
SOMETHING ELSE
Ink - Like picked out of the head of me or someone I know, a whole fantastic world to share for an hour and a half.
Cube - Also never to see again, it really messed with my head.
Pan's Labyrinth - Scary in so many ways.
Hero - See it, if for nothing else than just for the colors.
HONORARY MENTIONS
Snatch - Got kicked off this list by Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels.
11.14 - Sort of the forgotten Crash, it's perhaps not quite as good, but definitely worth watching.
Stardust - I do prefer it to Princess Bride, because that one totally falls off the wagon halfway through.
Batman Begins - Kicked, ofc, by The Dark Knight.
Pirets of the Carribbean:At world's end - If any of them were to make it, it would be this.
Funny Girl - I don't really do old movies, so this is the exception.
Happy Feet - We all know what it's like to have a rythm in our bodies that we can't let out, don't we?
Memoirs of a Geisha - My mind and I had a conversation. It went; "put it on", "nah", "why not?", "dunno".
Lucky Number Sl3vin - The further I get on this commenting, the more I start doubting what should on the list and not. Damnit.
Se7en - This is not on for the same reason as I felt obligated to put Memento on; it's good, everyone knows it, old news, boring.
The Tourist - Was a pleasant surprise all things considered, I think. Pleasant and surprising enough to get mentioned.
Avatar - Well, the graphics are fantastic. The story is a word-by-word ripoff from Pocahontas or every other Romeo and Juliet. Bah.
Silent Hill - The only other horror movie that's been to my liking. Pyramid-head! Run! Waaaah!
Okay before I run away, I want to make some little overview notes. It's obvious from the list, I think, that I favor strange and violent movies, preferably visually impressive, and that I've watched a lot of Korean and Danish movies these last few years. Also I have flashes of terrible taste. Definitely Maybe? Well, I stand by my list. There's not a single Swedish movie, interestingly. I was considering the Millenium-series, but in comparison with the books they just pale out into a mushy gray mass that I can't even review fairly, despite Noomi Rapace rockin' her boots off.
The movies that are on all three lists are these (correct me if I'm wrong):
The Lion King
Wall-E
The Dark Knight
which I would say is fair enough. If anyone else would like to contribute a list of their own, fret not, there is still time! ^^
Now then. AAAAAHHHHH!
I also want to point out that I didn't read your lists until now, because I didn't want to get last-minute infections from you that would ruin it :P the point was to share new things not echo each others, so that's how it is anyway.
TOP 9
The Big Blue - I cannot empathize enough the emotions this movie gave me. Fucking dangerous.
Leon - The love-at-first-sight meeting with Luc Besson and Jean Reno.
Oldboy - The whole movie is a bloody wonder, but that moment near the end hit me so damned hard.
Wall-E - Nicking in together with the Lion King, an instant classic that hits all the right notes.
The Lion King - In a sense my first meeting with concepts like honor, but most of all because I love Simba and Scar equally, which taught me so much.
District 9 - The best political movies are those that never feel like one.
Batman: The Dark Knight - We were all dancing around after leaving the cinema, so you know why.
Adam's Apples - Absurd, human and beautiful, a hidden Danish treasure ^^
Boondock Saints - If the stylish main characters don't win you over, the violence will :D
ANIMATED
How to train your Dragon - I also want a black beautiful cat-dragon! Gimme!
Ratatouille - Not sure why tbh but I love it.
FF7 Advent Children - Yes, actually, not just as a fan, but the visuals, the music, the composition, is great.
DRAMA / ROMANCE
Love Actually - In all honesty, basically the only romance movie you'll ever need.
Le Fabuleaux destin de Amelie du Montmartre - Had to write the whole title, because it feels just like the movie, ridiculous and perfect.
About Adam - Would love some opinions on this. It amused me greatly though.
Hard Candy - Surprised me at the time, and also of course star performance from Ellen Page.
The Merchant of Venice - Shakespeare! Amazing performance by Al Pacino as the Jew.
The King and the Clown / The King's Man - Korean historic drama, difficult but intriguing.
Postman to Heaven / Heaven's Postman - Fantastic visuals and charming story lifted this from just fan love of the actor to love of the movie itself.
Whale Rider - A slow but fierce story of a Maori girl fighting to fulfill her destiny despite her gender and the times around her.
Definitely Maybe - Charmed me despite going in with low expectations.
Ballad of Jack and Rose - I would never see it again, but it slowly, light as a breath, crept under your skin while watching.
Efter Bryllupet / After the Wedding - Touching and twisting.
Les amants du Point Neuf - One of those great movies you see only once because it hurts too much to watch.
Forrest Gump - Overwhelmingly cute and one of those happy success stories that doesn't make you barf.
The Fall - Because the act of telling a story can also be a story, and change the one who tells it.
Crash - Worth every award it's gotten.
HORROR
Cloverfield - Came into it not knowing anything, which was good. Got the proper surprise effect ;)
ACTION / THRILLER / SOMETHING
Kingdom of Heaven - Something about that whole honor and a man's gotta do crap that always works for me. Also Jeremy Irons and a cool king in a mask.
Once upon a time in Mexico - Like Boondock, it's an elegant mix of violence, style and humor.
Memento - Something of a token spot; yes it's good, yes it's innovative, we all heard it the first time.
V for Vendetta - Managing to keep decently close to the comic, while not feeling terribly much like one.
Inglorious Bastards - Not because of Brad Pitt, whom I hate in this movie, but because the script is fuckin' awesome.
Iron Man - Somewhat the same motivation as V for Vendetta; and R.D.Junior is ofc Stark. IRL. Really.
Pitch Black - Fantastic stylish sci-fi horror/action with a treasured absence of silly space-ships.
No Country for Old Men - This movie has balls.
300 - Love the visuals, even if I think they're already a little dated so you can "see the bluescreen".
The Good The Bad The Weird - Korean action movie with a lot of cool action and even a little plot.
Lock, Stock and 2 smoking barrels - Better than Snatch, IMO, in that it has more shooting ;)
History of Violence - Aside from the Hollywood touches that dirties it at times, it's a cute murderous story.
COMEDY
Easy A - The clever teen movie. Ooooh, was that a flying pig?
The Hangover - Hangs on just at my level of stupid humor.
Zombieland - Is so amusing it's criminal. Was that the second Emma Stone comedy? Look at that.
I'm A Cyborg but it's OK - Oldboy-director goes "I'ma do some random insane romance-comedy now", and it's just as great!
SOMETHING ELSE
Ink - Like picked out of the head of me or someone I know, a whole fantastic world to share for an hour and a half.
Cube - Also never to see again, it really messed with my head.
Pan's Labyrinth - Scary in so many ways.
Hero - See it, if for nothing else than just for the colors.
HONORARY MENTIONS
Snatch - Got kicked off this list by Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels.
11.14 - Sort of the forgotten Crash, it's perhaps not quite as good, but definitely worth watching.
Stardust - I do prefer it to Princess Bride, because that one totally falls off the wagon halfway through.
Batman Begins - Kicked, ofc, by The Dark Knight.
Pirets of the Carribbean:At world's end - If any of them were to make it, it would be this.
Funny Girl - I don't really do old movies, so this is the exception.
Happy Feet - We all know what it's like to have a rythm in our bodies that we can't let out, don't we?
Memoirs of a Geisha - My mind and I had a conversation. It went; "put it on", "nah", "why not?", "dunno".
Lucky Number Sl3vin - The further I get on this commenting, the more I start doubting what should on the list and not. Damnit.
Se7en - This is not on for the same reason as I felt obligated to put Memento on; it's good, everyone knows it, old news, boring.
The Tourist - Was a pleasant surprise all things considered, I think. Pleasant and surprising enough to get mentioned.
Avatar - Well, the graphics are fantastic. The story is a word-by-word ripoff from Pocahontas or every other Romeo and Juliet. Bah.
Silent Hill - The only other horror movie that's been to my liking. Pyramid-head! Run! Waaaah!
Okay before I run away, I want to make some little overview notes. It's obvious from the list, I think, that I favor strange and violent movies, preferably visually impressive, and that I've watched a lot of Korean and Danish movies these last few years. Also I have flashes of terrible taste. Definitely Maybe? Well, I stand by my list. There's not a single Swedish movie, interestingly. I was considering the Millenium-series, but in comparison with the books they just pale out into a mushy gray mass that I can't even review fairly, despite Noomi Rapace rockin' her boots off.
The movies that are on all three lists are these (correct me if I'm wrong):
The Lion King
Wall-E
The Dark Knight
which I would say is fair enough. If anyone else would like to contribute a list of their own, fret not, there is still time! ^^
Now then. AAAAAHHHHH!
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Setting the Stage
I've been working on a top50 movies imo list. It's impossible. It's like some kind of quantum-time-space-mechanics behind liking things, because I look at movie A and movie B and rate movie A higher, then look at movie C and think it's better than A but worse than B.
To make it at all possible I decided that it's only a top50 in the sense that those on the list are better than those not on the list. I'm not saying these are the movies with the best story ever, or the best screenplay, or the best music score, but rather those that stuck with me, no matter if it was because it was thought-provoking or immensely entertaining, or whatever.
So in essence, one could say I'm making a list of the 50 movies I am most likely to recommend to any given person on any given day.
Now, feel free to make your own lists! Top 10 or top 100, or whatever. Like always I'm making this list because I'd really like to have your lists :D Setting the example and hoping for everyone to follow! :P I need a little while longer though, I have like 15 movies competing for the last 5 spots on my list, and it's bloody difficult! It should come around sometime next week.
To make it at all possible I decided that it's only a top50 in the sense that those on the list are better than those not on the list. I'm not saying these are the movies with the best story ever, or the best screenplay, or the best music score, but rather those that stuck with me, no matter if it was because it was thought-provoking or immensely entertaining, or whatever.
So in essence, one could say I'm making a list of the 50 movies I am most likely to recommend to any given person on any given day.
Now, feel free to make your own lists! Top 10 or top 100, or whatever. Like always I'm making this list because I'd really like to have your lists :D Setting the example and hoping for everyone to follow! :P I need a little while longer though, I have like 15 movies competing for the last 5 spots on my list, and it's bloody difficult! It should come around sometime next week.
Monday, December 27, 2010
How Long Does It Take You To Read This?
You know what Hollywood has ruined for me? Aside from sensible beauty standards, gender roles, social life... actually intelligence, good stories, evil endings, sensibility and temperance... I'm off track, I'll try again.
You know what Hollywood has ruined for me? Nudity in movies. Whenever I see a movie that has good enough camera work and sound to not be some kid's wet dream from a garage, and there's someone naked in there, I jump as if someone threw a bucket of water in my face. "She's naked! She can't be naked, what is this, someone call... the cops, call a lawyer, call Bush! Now!"
If you're wondering what movie has nakedness, it's Macbeth from 2006. In Australia, naked women aren't a horror and sin against God. They're also redheads and have cool tattoos. Going a bit off track here again...
I happened upon it because I was looking up Sam Worthington because I watched Clash of the Titans (Sorry to interrupt, but why the hell is it named that? It makes less sense than Japanese anime naming O.o) because I was looking up Mads Mikkelsen (I just have to interject that, don't see this movie because of him, cuz his part sucks... actually the whole movie kinda sucks... the only reason to watch it really is for the actors, and in that case they all have better works...) because I watched King Arthur because I was looking up Joel Edgerton because I saw someone in something on tv who almost looked like him but it wasn't.
Joel Edgerton makes a hawt Gawain. Sorry, but somebody had to say it. Mads Mikkelsen makes a hawt Tristram as well. Then put them both on horses. And Keira Knightly in camo paint and leather straps stepping out of the forest mist. Mmmmm. Off track! Off track again!
Incidentally, I thought about how little that movie, King Arthur, makes any sense with the other legends like Tristram and Isolde or the Holy Grail. Not that any of that makes any sense to begin with. But it's fun to try and imagine those stories with these characters.
You know what Hollywood has ruined for me? Nudity in movies. Whenever I see a movie that has good enough camera work and sound to not be some kid's wet dream from a garage, and there's someone naked in there, I jump as if someone threw a bucket of water in my face. "She's naked! She can't be naked, what is this, someone call... the cops, call a lawyer, call Bush! Now!"
If you're wondering what movie has nakedness, it's Macbeth from 2006. In Australia, naked women aren't a horror and sin against God. They're also redheads and have cool tattoos. Going a bit off track here again...
I happened upon it because I was looking up Sam Worthington because I watched Clash of the Titans (Sorry to interrupt, but why the hell is it named that? It makes less sense than Japanese anime naming O.o) because I was looking up Mads Mikkelsen (I just have to interject that, don't see this movie because of him, cuz his part sucks... actually the whole movie kinda sucks... the only reason to watch it really is for the actors, and in that case they all have better works...) because I watched King Arthur because I was looking up Joel Edgerton because I saw someone in something on tv who almost looked like him but it wasn't.
Joel Edgerton makes a hawt Gawain. Sorry, but somebody had to say it. Mads Mikkelsen makes a hawt Tristram as well. Then put them both on horses. And Keira Knightly in camo paint and leather straps stepping out of the forest mist. Mmmmm. Off track! Off track again!
Incidentally, I thought about how little that movie, King Arthur, makes any sense with the other legends like Tristram and Isolde or the Holy Grail. Not that any of that makes any sense to begin with. But it's fun to try and imagine those stories with these characters.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Deadpool research :p and some princely stuff
Just watched The Nines, because I wanted to see Ryan Reynolds in a movie where he has actual lines and does some actual acting. It has bad scores on IMDB, and those are earned, it's not a good movie. But I was impressed with Reynolds.
The flaws of the movie I choose to blame on a shaky script, that would have made a better book, and repeatedly bad choices of camera angles. Also I hated Hope Davis, who is the second leading lady, and this movie really only has three roles in it. So yeah.
Not that I saw this movie because it would be good, so on to what I actually cared about. Basically, the movie is split in three parts and Reynolds play different people in those parts. And I was impressed, because those are really different people. The small things people do, subconscious gestures or way of speech or the way they move their faces, actors keep those throughout roles to varying degrees and with varying results. Worst examples that comes to mind would be Hugh Grant and Will Smith, best example Johnny Depp. I'm sure Reynolds have those too - everyone does - but in this movie he managed to get a very impressive amount of them under control. I felt like he was different people, and I tend to give actors a hard time about that.
I'm going to stop here before I repeat the word "impressive" too many times and embarrass myself.
I have good hopes for Deadpool. But sorry, Ryan, no matter how esthetically pleasing your face may be, and however good you are at making sad faces, I will still kill someone if you get to keep it in that movie.
Oh, oh, and also, I retract any previous statement I might have made of Jake Gyllenhaal as the Prince of Persia. In fact, I regret them and apologize for them. He was prefect. Although he did make the baby-face (you know, the eyebrows go up, the lower lip comes out, eyes bear a striking resemblance to a 90yo lady about to cry, and he goes from unconventional hunk to baby bloodhound) at least once, the presence of Arms and Cool Acrobatics and also New Fancy Accent (yes I'm a sucker for voices) saved his charm roll. Someone probably told him that pouting and making puppy-eyes isn't befitting of a war-prince of the Persian empire. Thank you, that person.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Woof
Hello. For any other Deadpool fans, there is an animated movie, that's really two animated movies, called Hulk vs. (and this totally fucked up my punctuation so I'm adding this to make it better). In the first part, Hulk vs. Wolverine, we get... well, guess. Not sure how and exactly when this fits in with the general Marvel timeline, or which version of it it is in... whatever. The idea is that Deadpool is in it.
"I shot him in the ass! With one of these! ...what? I did!"
The only thing wrong is that there's too little of him. When Deadpool's teammates try to wring his neck going "don't you ever fucking shut up", he should have blabbered on so much that we the audience, being non-homicidal normal people, want to go "yes God finally! Do it!"
I'm still drawing monsters. Here's the latest little random creation. It's very vanilla but I was just keeping my hands busy while I was talking on the phone.
I erased very little, actually. Kinda proud of that, even if it's just a sketchy thingamabob. I also hate his other arm. That's why it's outside the frame. "I totally ran out of paper... uh monitor! I did!"
And eh, his ears are under the bandana. I, uh, kinda forgot about them.
*EDIT* Please click it? His mouth looks really weird zoomed out like this -_-
"I shot him in the ass! With one of these! ...what? I did!"
The only thing wrong is that there's too little of him. When Deadpool's teammates try to wring his neck going "don't you ever fucking shut up", he should have blabbered on so much that we the audience, being non-homicidal normal people, want to go "yes God finally! Do it!"
I'm still drawing monsters. Here's the latest little random creation. It's very vanilla but I was just keeping my hands busy while I was talking on the phone.I erased very little, actually. Kinda proud of that, even if it's just a sketchy thingamabob. I also hate his other arm. That's why it's outside the frame. "I totally ran out of paper... uh monitor! I did!"
And eh, his ears are under the bandana. I, uh, kinda forgot about them.
*EDIT* Please click it? His mouth looks really weird zoomed out like this -_-
Sunday, January 31, 2010
SHORYUKEN ! ^^
Writing the earlier post (read that first please if you may) I realized I'm a terrible fan for not staying updated. So I read up, and here's the news:
Hope has sprung.
- Deadpool movie absolutely and undoubtedly underway.
- Writers of Zombieland have been confirmed to be writing it.
- Ryan Reynolds is a looongtime fan of Deadpool, have read the comicbooks and are being a pain in the ass of directors, writers and generally everyone involved, at first by trying to get the movie done and then by trying to get Deadpool right. From the interviews I read (short ones, the man is not a media whore, yay) he seems to have the right idea of what Deadpool is so this is a good thing.
- Reynolds agrees that what he played in the Origins: Wolverine movie is not what he wants Deadpool to be.
- And the word is that directors and writers want to make the movie a reboot, not built on the performance in earlier mentioned movie (since it was shitty).
- There is a really nice picture about, that I don't know where it's from because Reynolds claims there is no Deadpool suit yet and that he has not worn anything along those lines. It's pretty nice. Although obviously Deadpool would laugh his head off at it. I mean, jeez, where's your sense of fun? I bet he'd like to be depicted doing unimaginable things to cute kittens, or maybe holding the severed head of Immortal Man?
Hope has sprung.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
The Movie of 2009 Award
Movies seen lately (not in any particular order):
Ice Age 3 - <3 <3 <3 - it is very impressive of a no.3 in a series to be as good as no.1 in the series, especially when no.1 was very good too. But I like no.2 best, still, maybe because it was the first one I saw. Still, dinosaurs charm me. Throw in a t-rex and I clap and nod, give me a triceratops and I'll forgive you anything.
District 9 - <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 - I always find it easier to sympathize with animated cricket-like green aliens in terribly unfashionable clothing tearing humans limb from limb than I do with humans. I am completely serious. But aside from that, amazing movie, with amazing actors that I've never heard of before but deserve fame and fortune. It's just right with the gore to make it stay with you, and just right with the story to make you feel with the characters, but not mindlessly cheer for them. And I insist the alien was named Christopher! That's what I heard!
Beowulf (the semi-animated one) - <3 <3 - not much to say. It's fun trying to look through the legend and try to find the man and the actual story. Haven't seen any other Beowulf movie either. It has swords and kings and dragons and a naked Angelina Jolie. Blah blah blah.
Coraline - <3 <3 <3 <3 - dunno if this is actually for children or not, but it's a stop-motion doll movie in kiddie style, kinda Nightmare Before Christmas. Something about this one just freaked me out to no end. It gave me nightmares where my mom cut off the limbs off some poor animal she made me hold, and then started digging into my hand.
Sherlock Holmes - <3 <3 <3 - and one of those hearts is solely for Jude Law, whom I otherwise don't like so much but who is great in this movie. It's entertaining, but wasn't worth going to the cinema for, and Robert Downey Jr made such a perfect Iron Man than seeing him anywhere else is like it would be seeing Tony Stark putting on a pig tail and chasing zebras around a ballroom. Not good, and not funny. Also way too hollywoodized for my tastes.
Pandorum - <3 <3 <3 - I am a relative noob at horror, and especially space horror. This movie might hold lot of clichés that I missed since I haven't seen any other of them. But it was well made, and paced very nicely, and managed to have a plot not entirely predictable which is very good for a horror movie. It also had Norman Reedus, very briefly, I rest my case.
Avatar - <3 <3 <3 <3 - I would give it five hearts, but the harsh and honest truth is that the story leaves you lacking in every single way. The CGI is amazing, and see it in 3D, and I really recomment seeing it. There was true potential of a very, very epic movie here. But the moment you see the first of the alien race, you know the story. They do a reasonably nice take on it, but that can't hide the fact that it borderlines plagiarism, if that can still be applied to something that's been done over 9k times before. That it still manages to be one of the best movies ever says something about how good everything else in it is.
The Happening - <3 <3 <3 - I didn't see the whole movie, missed the start, so I can't give it a fair score. Some ppl think it's silly, I think you gotta stop looking for silly and just close your eyes and listen to the wind and let him tell you the story. Open your mind. I liked it.
I was going to give my Movie of 2009 Award to Inglorious Bastards. It's the first time I've seen Quentin Tarantino return to the genius of Pulp Fiction, instead of fillers like Kill Bill or Death Proof, or I-don't-know-what's like From Dusk till Dawn. But District 9 gave it a good fight. I think the Bastards bring it home thanks to the extra points of Christoph Waltz, despite a few weak moments in the cinema with Brad Pitt (a flaw of the script rather than the actor), because I have to pull a few points from District 9 for making me biased by involving cute baby alien. Still, the two are as close to equal as you can get without actually being it :P
That's all for the Movie Review Corner for tonight. Over and out.
Ice Age 3 - <3 <3 <3 - it is very impressive of a no.3 in a series to be as good as no.1 in the series, especially when no.1 was very good too. But I like no.2 best, still, maybe because it was the first one I saw. Still, dinosaurs charm me. Throw in a t-rex and I clap and nod, give me a triceratops and I'll forgive you anything.
District 9 - <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 - I always find it easier to sympathize with animated cricket-like green aliens in terribly unfashionable clothing tearing humans limb from limb than I do with humans. I am completely serious. But aside from that, amazing movie, with amazing actors that I've never heard of before but deserve fame and fortune. It's just right with the gore to make it stay with you, and just right with the story to make you feel with the characters, but not mindlessly cheer for them. And I insist the alien was named Christopher! That's what I heard!
Beowulf (the semi-animated one) - <3 <3 - not much to say. It's fun trying to look through the legend and try to find the man and the actual story. Haven't seen any other Beowulf movie either. It has swords and kings and dragons and a naked Angelina Jolie. Blah blah blah.
Coraline - <3 <3 <3 <3 - dunno if this is actually for children or not, but it's a stop-motion doll movie in kiddie style, kinda Nightmare Before Christmas. Something about this one just freaked me out to no end. It gave me nightmares where my mom cut off the limbs off some poor animal she made me hold, and then started digging into my hand.
Sherlock Holmes - <3 <3 <3 - and one of those hearts is solely for Jude Law, whom I otherwise don't like so much but who is great in this movie. It's entertaining, but wasn't worth going to the cinema for, and Robert Downey Jr made such a perfect Iron Man than seeing him anywhere else is like it would be seeing Tony Stark putting on a pig tail and chasing zebras around a ballroom. Not good, and not funny. Also way too hollywoodized for my tastes.
Pandorum - <3 <3 <3 - I am a relative noob at horror, and especially space horror. This movie might hold lot of clichés that I missed since I haven't seen any other of them. But it was well made, and paced very nicely, and managed to have a plot not entirely predictable which is very good for a horror movie. It also had Norman Reedus, very briefly, I rest my case.
Avatar - <3 <3 <3 <3 - I would give it five hearts, but the harsh and honest truth is that the story leaves you lacking in every single way. The CGI is amazing, and see it in 3D, and I really recomment seeing it. There was true potential of a very, very epic movie here. But the moment you see the first of the alien race, you know the story. They do a reasonably nice take on it, but that can't hide the fact that it borderlines plagiarism, if that can still be applied to something that's been done over 9k times before. That it still manages to be one of the best movies ever says something about how good everything else in it is.
The Happening - <3 <3 <3 - I didn't see the whole movie, missed the start, so I can't give it a fair score. Some ppl think it's silly, I think you gotta stop looking for silly and just close your eyes and listen to the wind and let him tell you the story. Open your mind. I liked it.
I was going to give my Movie of 2009 Award to Inglorious Bastards. It's the first time I've seen Quentin Tarantino return to the genius of Pulp Fiction, instead of fillers like Kill Bill or Death Proof, or I-don't-know-what's like From Dusk till Dawn. But District 9 gave it a good fight. I think the Bastards bring it home thanks to the extra points of Christoph Waltz, despite a few weak moments in the cinema with Brad Pitt (a flaw of the script rather than the actor), because I have to pull a few points from District 9 for making me biased by involving cute baby alien. Still, the two are as close to equal as you can get without actually being it :P
That's all for the Movie Review Corner for tonight. Over and out.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
High on Reality and Darkness
I want to tell you something, a lot of things, you being used in its plural form in the meaning of "the people of the world". I just want to pour some things out of my head. I'm not drunk, although I've never before wanted to be as much as I do right now. I'm going to tell you why I'm not drunk in a bit.
This is going to be a long post.
It's the Uppsala International Short Film Festival, and I'm enjoying it as much as I can. Almost 6 hours of short films today makes for a lot of varying quality, and a lot of emotions. They're beginning to settle now because I've gotten home and am returning to my usual bubble, so I have to write quickly. This might turn out a bit without structure.
The last block of films I saw were under the theme of "gay/lesbian". They confirmed even more the growing suspicion of how heterosexual I am. Not that I believe anyone really is 100 % one or the other, but the percentile women who attract me is very, very small. Sadly. Sadly, because it limits my world. On the other hand women scares me, so that might be it. They really, really scare me. All defenses I have, every last bit of bubble and shield and sword, go up at the presence of a woman. Hanging out with guys is much easier. And this from someone who wants to break genders, make them not a factor to social life. Who am I to say "treat genders equally" when as soon as I see boobs I retract like a snail in a shell? No, actually, it's not the boobs. It's the face. The eyes, and the make-up. Women look so sneaky and seductive and mean.
I am coming to terms with that I am woman, and I am disabled. Generally I wanted to paint the former over with thick black paint, and hide the later under a pile of leaves. But the womanhood is still there under the paint, and the leaves blow away and scatter at the slightest gust of wind.
A disabled guy in one of the films compared being woman to being disabled. He wanted the disabled to gather as a people, like a race or ethnicity, and start war on the "healthy". He thought the reasons women are looked down on are the same as why disabled are looked down on. Because humanity fears weakness. He compared disability to Oden's sacrifice of one eye to get the power of the well, or Jesus' sacrifice on the cross; offering one thing to gain another. He cried at the mention of how children with one of those syndromes, I think it was Down's, are no longer born in Denmark because of screening of fetuses. They're selected away.
And I was thinking, if someone gave me the option to cut of my leg right now and replace it with cyborg parts, I would. And the thought have run through my mind more than once, that maybe I shouldn't have children on the off chance that whatever I have is inherited. Not that I have an overwhelming wish to get pregant or give birth anyway, it scares the shitfuck out of me. But still. And I was wondering, would that guy include me in his army of disabled people? Does mine count that far? How bad is it really? On the point scale of sucking, what is mine worth? Or am I stuck in between again.
There were a wide range of women at the showing of the gay/lesbian thing, everything from the femme fatale to the butchy butch. I looked at them and wondered if that was what people saw when they look at me? But I also felt how we overlapped and where we were different. And once again, how much I am a woman. I don't want to replace it, just stash it away in the corner marked "insignificant". Or I don't know what I want. Sometimes I think I know exactly what I want only there is no way to realize it, so I'm just dressing it up in "possible" words, when everything I feel is really "impossible".
I have a new pair of jeans and I love them endlessly. I was waiting for a movie to start yesterday, and a guy and a girl walked by me, and then the guy said to the girl sort of low-key "I thought that was a dude", that's how awesome my jeans are.
I usually have a thingy made from the same stuff that's in hockey sticks to help me walk better, but it's broken so I've been without it for a while, and it sucks giant hairy monkey balls, is what it does. I stumble a lot. On the way home I actually stumbled so much I fell on the asphalt. My thoughts were, chronologically, "oh shit", "cool, I'll scrape my jeans", and "I hope I don't land on my bag and break stuff". Then, on the ground, I was just overwhelmed with anger. A little at me and my sucky leg, but mostly because I felt embarrassed and mortified about falling and it was everyone else's fault that I felt that way. If I'd been alone I wouldn't have. So I was angry at the world, and in an uncharacteristical display of emotion I cursed, flailed about a bit, got up and kicked the curb a few times for good measure. I really wanted to turn into a karate-master, go into a dark alley and kick the shit out of whatever random person I found there.
After that I felt dark. A friend was going to a club and I'd said no because it was reggae and because I wasn't in any way dressed for partying, but I decided I wanted to be drunk and get a hug, so I walked there. I stopped outside, and looked at all the people, and listened to them being drunk and happy, and looked at the girls and then at my jeans, and I turned around and walked home. Even dolphins want to be sea lions at the sea lion beach.
Where are all those butch women normally? I've never seen them before. I've never seen a gay couple on town either. Where are they all hiding? And why can't we all mix? Because sea lions are sea lions and dolphins are dolphins and neither want to admit there are mutant sea animals in between.
Who wants a girl who dresses like me? Boys seem to want women who aggressively declare they are women by the way they are and talk and walk and dress. There might be some evolutionary reason for this. I don't have any clear reason why I dress like I do except I think it looks good. I think skirts look stupid, most of the time on most people. I wish boys would agree with me. Can I has brainwashing power? Most of all I think, everyone want to display who they are through how they dress, in some way, more or less. And if I walked outside in whatever is today's fashion, and felt like I looked like everyone else, I would feel so stupid. Probably how they would feel in my clothes.
It's in my head. I am well aware that the only reason I didn't go inside the club is because I decided against it; I don't blame that on other people like I blame them for feeling stupid about falling. I don't regret or feel like I missed out on something big either. I shot a look at the sea lion beach and decided I wasn't up for it.
If you hug me right now, it'd better not be because of anything I've written in here. Spikes are out for tonight.
I came home and saw myself in the glass in the door to the building, and I thought "you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of". I look awesome. That's not the issue.
I'll make a pact with you. I won't delete this post in the morning when I realize how self-obsessive it is, and you... you handle me with care, ok? Respectful care.
And you might not realize it from reading this, but I am ok. I am so good. I am high on reality and darkness and the energy that random drunken people on town surround themselves with, and the anonymity of being stumbled into or yelled at a friday night. I feel like my edges are sharper. I feel photoshopped. I feel alone and stronger because of it. So no worries :)
This is going to be a long post.
It's the Uppsala International Short Film Festival, and I'm enjoying it as much as I can. Almost 6 hours of short films today makes for a lot of varying quality, and a lot of emotions. They're beginning to settle now because I've gotten home and am returning to my usual bubble, so I have to write quickly. This might turn out a bit without structure.
The last block of films I saw were under the theme of "gay/lesbian". They confirmed even more the growing suspicion of how heterosexual I am. Not that I believe anyone really is 100 % one or the other, but the percentile women who attract me is very, very small. Sadly. Sadly, because it limits my world. On the other hand women scares me, so that might be it. They really, really scare me. All defenses I have, every last bit of bubble and shield and sword, go up at the presence of a woman. Hanging out with guys is much easier. And this from someone who wants to break genders, make them not a factor to social life. Who am I to say "treat genders equally" when as soon as I see boobs I retract like a snail in a shell? No, actually, it's not the boobs. It's the face. The eyes, and the make-up. Women look so sneaky and seductive and mean.
I am coming to terms with that I am woman, and I am disabled. Generally I wanted to paint the former over with thick black paint, and hide the later under a pile of leaves. But the womanhood is still there under the paint, and the leaves blow away and scatter at the slightest gust of wind.
A disabled guy in one of the films compared being woman to being disabled. He wanted the disabled to gather as a people, like a race or ethnicity, and start war on the "healthy". He thought the reasons women are looked down on are the same as why disabled are looked down on. Because humanity fears weakness. He compared disability to Oden's sacrifice of one eye to get the power of the well, or Jesus' sacrifice on the cross; offering one thing to gain another. He cried at the mention of how children with one of those syndromes, I think it was Down's, are no longer born in Denmark because of screening of fetuses. They're selected away.
And I was thinking, if someone gave me the option to cut of my leg right now and replace it with cyborg parts, I would. And the thought have run through my mind more than once, that maybe I shouldn't have children on the off chance that whatever I have is inherited. Not that I have an overwhelming wish to get pregant or give birth anyway, it scares the shitfuck out of me. But still. And I was wondering, would that guy include me in his army of disabled people? Does mine count that far? How bad is it really? On the point scale of sucking, what is mine worth? Or am I stuck in between again.
There were a wide range of women at the showing of the gay/lesbian thing, everything from the femme fatale to the butchy butch. I looked at them and wondered if that was what people saw when they look at me? But I also felt how we overlapped and where we were different. And once again, how much I am a woman. I don't want to replace it, just stash it away in the corner marked "insignificant". Or I don't know what I want. Sometimes I think I know exactly what I want only there is no way to realize it, so I'm just dressing it up in "possible" words, when everything I feel is really "impossible".
I have a new pair of jeans and I love them endlessly. I was waiting for a movie to start yesterday, and a guy and a girl walked by me, and then the guy said to the girl sort of low-key "I thought that was a dude", that's how awesome my jeans are.
I usually have a thingy made from the same stuff that's in hockey sticks to help me walk better, but it's broken so I've been without it for a while, and it sucks giant hairy monkey balls, is what it does. I stumble a lot. On the way home I actually stumbled so much I fell on the asphalt. My thoughts were, chronologically, "oh shit", "cool, I'll scrape my jeans", and "I hope I don't land on my bag and break stuff". Then, on the ground, I was just overwhelmed with anger. A little at me and my sucky leg, but mostly because I felt embarrassed and mortified about falling and it was everyone else's fault that I felt that way. If I'd been alone I wouldn't have. So I was angry at the world, and in an uncharacteristical display of emotion I cursed, flailed about a bit, got up and kicked the curb a few times for good measure. I really wanted to turn into a karate-master, go into a dark alley and kick the shit out of whatever random person I found there.
After that I felt dark. A friend was going to a club and I'd said no because it was reggae and because I wasn't in any way dressed for partying, but I decided I wanted to be drunk and get a hug, so I walked there. I stopped outside, and looked at all the people, and listened to them being drunk and happy, and looked at the girls and then at my jeans, and I turned around and walked home. Even dolphins want to be sea lions at the sea lion beach.
Where are all those butch women normally? I've never seen them before. I've never seen a gay couple on town either. Where are they all hiding? And why can't we all mix? Because sea lions are sea lions and dolphins are dolphins and neither want to admit there are mutant sea animals in between.
Who wants a girl who dresses like me? Boys seem to want women who aggressively declare they are women by the way they are and talk and walk and dress. There might be some evolutionary reason for this. I don't have any clear reason why I dress like I do except I think it looks good. I think skirts look stupid, most of the time on most people. I wish boys would agree with me. Can I has brainwashing power? Most of all I think, everyone want to display who they are through how they dress, in some way, more or less. And if I walked outside in whatever is today's fashion, and felt like I looked like everyone else, I would feel so stupid. Probably how they would feel in my clothes.
It's in my head. I am well aware that the only reason I didn't go inside the club is because I decided against it; I don't blame that on other people like I blame them for feeling stupid about falling. I don't regret or feel like I missed out on something big either. I shot a look at the sea lion beach and decided I wasn't up for it.
If you hug me right now, it'd better not be because of anything I've written in here. Spikes are out for tonight.
I came home and saw myself in the glass in the door to the building, and I thought "you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of". I look awesome. That's not the issue.
I'll make a pact with you. I won't delete this post in the morning when I realize how self-obsessive it is, and you... you handle me with care, ok? Respectful care.
And you might not realize it from reading this, but I am ok. I am so good. I am high on reality and darkness and the energy that random drunken people on town surround themselves with, and the anonymity of being stumbled into or yelled at a friday night. I feel like my edges are sharper. I feel photoshopped. I feel alone and stronger because of it. So no worries :)
Monday, September 14, 2009
Skillz
Hey, we begin with boring information, feel free to skip ahead:
something's up with my blog, or my internet, or my computer, or a combination of all three, because sometimes when I open the page it decides to take 5 minutes of chewing before it agrees to recognize that I'm pressing a button. (With the funny effect that the first time it happened I clicked the "comments" link a few dozen times because I thought my mouse was out of batteries, so that after those 5 minutes I got thirty-something new firefox windows in a second and a half and firefox crashed along with various other parts of my poor old 'puter. ) Anyway, thus blogging has become somewhat more of a hassle than it was before, and hence the regularity of posts may vary.
Then moving on to what I actually wanted to say:
Culture day in town last saturday, missed most of it because, well, dunno. But I did see some short movies, old ones that they show as a taste for the movie festival (film festival?) in october. Really made me want to see the new ones then. I loved most of them, and liked the rest. Thus I'm linking three of them I found on YouTube, belgian all three I think. (Belgian is such an absurd and fascinating language to anyone knowing/studying any of english, french, danish or german... like a mutant child of all four.) Don't read the comments before you've watched the movies, because spoilers really spoil at least the second and third, imo.
FLATLIFE
The Bloody Olive
Gridlock
Hard to pick a favorite really :P I am in favor of the last one. What do you guys think?
Edit: I got really uncertain if it's Belgian or the Netherlands or... whatever. I'm not going to change the post anyway. I'll have to live with the humiliation ;)
something's up with my blog, or my internet, or my computer, or a combination of all three, because sometimes when I open the page it decides to take 5 minutes of chewing before it agrees to recognize that I'm pressing a button. (With the funny effect that the first time it happened I clicked the "comments" link a few dozen times because I thought my mouse was out of batteries, so that after those 5 minutes I got thirty-something new firefox windows in a second and a half and firefox crashed along with various other parts of my poor old 'puter. ) Anyway, thus blogging has become somewhat more of a hassle than it was before, and hence the regularity of posts may vary.
Then moving on to what I actually wanted to say:
Culture day in town last saturday, missed most of it because, well, dunno. But I did see some short movies, old ones that they show as a taste for the movie festival (film festival?) in october. Really made me want to see the new ones then. I loved most of them, and liked the rest. Thus I'm linking three of them I found on YouTube, belgian all three I think. (Belgian is such an absurd and fascinating language to anyone knowing/studying any of english, french, danish or german... like a mutant child of all four.) Don't read the comments before you've watched the movies, because spoilers really spoil at least the second and third, imo.
FLATLIFE
The Bloody Olive
Gridlock
Hard to pick a favorite really :P I am in favor of the last one. What do you guys think?
Edit: I got really uncertain if it's Belgian or the Netherlands or... whatever. I'm not going to change the post anyway. I'll have to live with the humiliation ;)
Monday, August 31, 2009
Public letter to Disney
Dear Disney.
I apologize for all the crap I've spewed on you for sucking in comparison to Squaresoft, being sexist pigs with no imagination, being hopeless at making games and being solely focused on making money rather than produce good stories, and a number of other failures.
In respect of the chokehold you now have on my childhood idols and standards of heroism, I will not make violent, vulgar, exaggerated threats, nor ironic, bitter and bitchy jokes. I lay down my sword and my spear at your feet and I kneel in horror at the damage you could do to my fragile inner child. I will beg. That you in aquiring Marvel, and all that it stands for, do not make it into the regular mainstream, mindless, kiddy crap you usually produce in the name of income. That you do not stand in the way of what could be great, violent, gory movies of characters that are indeed great, violent and gory. That you do not reduce such imminent figures as Thor or Wolverine or Deadpool to the shallow pastell-colored idiots that frequent your productions.
I beg of those at Marvel to not give in to such attempts at brainwashing, should this my humble request be denied.
Together with the giants of Marvel we are standing at the threshold to a dawning new age, and it is you, Disney, who will decide whether it will be an age of conquest and glory or a heart-tearing, pathetic disaster.
I await your answer with greatest humility.
// Not a fan of yours, but clearly of Marvel
I apologize for all the crap I've spewed on you for sucking in comparison to Squaresoft, being sexist pigs with no imagination, being hopeless at making games and being solely focused on making money rather than produce good stories, and a number of other failures.
In respect of the chokehold you now have on my childhood idols and standards of heroism, I will not make violent, vulgar, exaggerated threats, nor ironic, bitter and bitchy jokes. I lay down my sword and my spear at your feet and I kneel in horror at the damage you could do to my fragile inner child. I will beg. That you in aquiring Marvel, and all that it stands for, do not make it into the regular mainstream, mindless, kiddy crap you usually produce in the name of income. That you do not stand in the way of what could be great, violent, gory movies of characters that are indeed great, violent and gory. That you do not reduce such imminent figures as Thor or Wolverine or Deadpool to the shallow pastell-colored idiots that frequent your productions.
I beg of those at Marvel to not give in to such attempts at brainwashing, should this my humble request be denied.
Together with the giants of Marvel we are standing at the threshold to a dawning new age, and it is you, Disney, who will decide whether it will be an age of conquest and glory or a heart-tearing, pathetic disaster.
I await your answer with greatest humility.
// Not a fan of yours, but clearly of Marvel
Saturday, April 4, 2009
The Butterfly of Troy
I've had lots of thoughts to blog about, but without even a hint of easy access to a computer those get lost in the vastness of space and time.
Watched Troy last night. It's not quite as painful as watching Tristram and Isolde was but that moment when Hector walks out to meet Achilles, or the moment when Paris says "Father, burn it!" about the Greek's wooden horse, it still cuts to my bones. Because I'm a person who likes to fix things. And to watch others' mistakes, to know the humongous consequences of those mistakes, pains me.
In the case of Troy they mostly make those mistakes because of honor or because of religion (except selfish Achilles, who does them of stupidity), and then they're easier to bear. In Romeo and Juliet they make them because of youth and love, and it makes me disgusted with them. In Tristram and Isolde they make them at the wicked twist of chance, because of the tiniest circumstances and the goodwill of some, selfishness of others. Because of humanity and nature, you could say. So I watched until the pain got too great and I turned it off. I had to. My mind was imploding of sadness, and of fear for those tiny, tiny circumstances being the founding ground of life-altering decisions. The flapping of butterfly wings in Africa, that becomes the storm here.
I see these butterflies, and at times, the pain of their consequences becomes too great for one mind to handle. So I close my eyes. But the butterflies keep flapping whether I see them or not... and they're lucky to not have the brain tissue to care about the responsibility.
Watched Troy last night. It's not quite as painful as watching Tristram and Isolde was but that moment when Hector walks out to meet Achilles, or the moment when Paris says "Father, burn it!" about the Greek's wooden horse, it still cuts to my bones. Because I'm a person who likes to fix things. And to watch others' mistakes, to know the humongous consequences of those mistakes, pains me.
In the case of Troy they mostly make those mistakes because of honor or because of religion (except selfish Achilles, who does them of stupidity), and then they're easier to bear. In Romeo and Juliet they make them because of youth and love, and it makes me disgusted with them. In Tristram and Isolde they make them at the wicked twist of chance, because of the tiniest circumstances and the goodwill of some, selfishness of others. Because of humanity and nature, you could say. So I watched until the pain got too great and I turned it off. I had to. My mind was imploding of sadness, and of fear for those tiny, tiny circumstances being the founding ground of life-altering decisions. The flapping of butterfly wings in Africa, that becomes the storm here.
I see these butterflies, and at times, the pain of their consequences becomes too great for one mind to handle. So I close my eyes. But the butterflies keep flapping whether I see them or not... and they're lucky to not have the brain tissue to care about the responsibility.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Carnege
Forgot to tell about the Tattoo Expo (but Nightflyer filled you in a little, I guess?). Fun. So many ideas, so little time. And so little space! I don't want to cover my entire body in tattoos. =P But I came to think of that if could be a good way to hide my skin-thing. I could totally imagine tattooing the entire left arm, shoulder to wrist, which would cover it up. I thought about piercing my ear, finally (two holes in the right ear, don't want in both) but didn't feel like it right then. I will definitively get a tattoo eventually, but I'll need to pile up some gold first; my treasury is in a sad state.
The evening ended with Iron Man, a most superb movie, though his lovidoviness with Pepper irritated me. Can Hollywood produce one single movie without having to add love to the story? The old "the hero gets the girl", and the old "hero saves girl" really pulled a lot from my final opinion of it.
The Expo all in all resulted in two things: web addresses and phonenumbers to very good artists in case I, in the future, would have the cash to go get a tattoo by a real skilled artist. And this:
This is Carnege. He's a psychopathic alien-infested bad guy in Spider-Man. (Everybody say: "Hello Carnege!")
I saw a photo of him being tattooed to some guy's arm (this exact picture) and I thought... he could make a real good tattoo. I love tattoos that look as if the image is a part of the body, either a pattern following natural lines or something crawling out from underneath the skin. Carnege's loopy symbiot would be perfect for it, while maintaining my nerd-factor. I think it could get really good. ^^ Only problem is to get someone to sketch the final image out; I can't really do this symbiot-thing very well.
I have candy, chips, and a new game. Cheerios!
The evening ended with Iron Man, a most superb movie, though his lovidoviness with Pepper irritated me. Can Hollywood produce one single movie without having to add love to the story? The old "the hero gets the girl", and the old "hero saves girl" really pulled a lot from my final opinion of it.
The Expo all in all resulted in two things: web addresses and phonenumbers to very good artists in case I, in the future, would have the cash to go get a tattoo by a real skilled artist. And this:
This is Carnege. He's a psychopathic alien-infested bad guy in Spider-Man. (Everybody say: "Hello Carnege!")I saw a photo of him being tattooed to some guy's arm (this exact picture) and I thought... he could make a real good tattoo. I love tattoos that look as if the image is a part of the body, either a pattern following natural lines or something crawling out from underneath the skin. Carnege's loopy symbiot would be perfect for it, while maintaining my nerd-factor. I think it could get really good. ^^ Only problem is to get someone to sketch the final image out; I can't really do this symbiot-thing very well.
I have candy, chips, and a new game. Cheerios!
Saturday, May 3, 2008
"Only Spartan women can give birth to real men!"
My view of honor has been seriously fucked up by all comics and books I've read throughout my childhood, so I must say that watching 300 was an enormous experience. I wish I'd had the sense to watch it on cinema, but I had been gruesomely misinformed that it was just a long splasher movie of too much blood, like a prolonged version of the mad crusade-slaughter in Kingdom of Heaven. That is, I believe, the part I like the least in KoH, so I avoided 300 and was idiotic enough to ignore the fact that several of my best liked friends and webcomics continuously kept yelling "This Is Sparta!" at all odd times.
I now stand corrected. I watched it approximately five minutes ago, and my fingers are itching to press the play button again. Just to illustrate how good I thought it was, I can honestly say that I was not once distracted by the disturbingly many (300, I believe^^) half naked and very muscular men in cool looking mantles and helmets soaked in sweat and blood standing around with flexing muscles being zoomed in on every other second. Now that I think of it, I do believe I should press the play button again and pay a little more attention to that fact. Excuse me for a few hours or so.
Oh, and I also watched Stardust. It's like a fairytale (for some reason I'd gotten it into my head that it was Science Fiction, so boy was I in for a surprise). Very cute. Right. Bye.
I now stand corrected. I watched it approximately five minutes ago, and my fingers are itching to press the play button again. Just to illustrate how good I thought it was, I can honestly say that I was not once distracted by the disturbingly many (300, I believe^^) half naked and very muscular men in cool looking mantles and helmets soaked in sweat and blood standing around with flexing muscles being zoomed in on every other second. Now that I think of it, I do believe I should press the play button again and pay a little more attention to that fact. Excuse me for a few hours or so.
Oh, and I also watched Stardust. It's like a fairytale (for some reason I'd gotten it into my head that it was Science Fiction, so boy was I in for a surprise). Very cute. Right. Bye.
Friday, April 4, 2008
review
Our teacher in religion, who also is a priest and with a doctorate in teology, said we should see it if we wanted and then we could talk about it in class. We haven't had class yet, so I might bring this up again later, but I wanted to talk about it now anyway. Firstly, something within me didn't like this movie. It wasn't the violence, the religiousness, the Mel Gibson, I can't put my finger on what. But aside from this instinctive reaction, there was a lot to like and hate.
As a means for learning, it's bliming. The character of Satan (played by a woman for all intents and purposes) wanders around in the different scenes, seen by no one but Jesus, eternally present. The part of Christianity that Gibson belongs to believes that, simply put, Jesus was the bait with which Satan was defeated. Satan thought that he was winning, driving people to kill the son of God, but when Jesus was dead Satan realized he had lost, that because Jesus died for the sins of mankind he would never have much power over them again. This is illustrated beautifully in the movie. There is also the theory of the angry god, the god that must take all his rage out on his son to be able to forgive mankind, thus Jesus inhuman suffering. I would assume Gibson believes this also, otherwise how would he justify the sheer amount of violence. Then there is the belief in the strong connection between Jesus and Maria, that the holy mother would have shared some supernatural bond with him, a belief especially nurtured in the Catholic church. The portrayal of Judas is also interesting, with his regret and eventual madness, as opposed to the other theory of Jesus having his betray him to bring about the passion and his release from his human body.
Artistically, it's rather well thought out. The set is beautiful, costumes feel natural. Some things feel exaggerated, such as weather effects and a lot of slow-motion shots. And for some reason I'm bothered by the fact that Jesus is so handsome. It makes me think of animal rights and the fact that some people only think we should save the cute animals and forget the rest. Anyway. The movie begins in the garden where Jesus is betrayed by Judas, where we also see Satan for the first time, and "necessary information" is then given as flashbacks along the way. There is a specifially fantastic sequence when Jesus is standing on the hill where they will nail him to the cross. The screen cuts to when Jesus was having dinner with his apprentices, where a small package is carried to the table, and the cloth wrapping thrown aside to reveal the bread. In the next moment you see the soldiers tear the clothes off Jesus' body.
Some have complained about the fact that they speak Arameic, the language that Jesus was supposed to have spoken. I thought it was a detail that greatly added to the realism, which is needed, since the reasonable part of my mind whines about some things that feel wrong, such as how could Jesus possible carry the damned cross when the other guy who comes in, who hasn't had the skin whipped from his body, can hardly walk with it. Then there is clear antisemitism here and there. Rivalery between Christianity and Judism may be unavoidable, but if Gibson want people to take him seriously, he may need to take them seriously. I doubt Jesus said anything about jews being bad.
As for the violence, I can't help but wonder how possible it is, how much a real human being could take. And also whether it is a part of the legend that Jesus could take much more than anyone else. Wasn't he supposed to be human also? The only part I couldn't bear to watch was when they actually nailed him to the cross. More the sound than the imagery, I imagine.
All in all, worth watching if you're interested in the religious aspects, and I believe more to be seen as symbolic than litteral, even if Gibson probably wouldn't agree.
As a means for learning, it's bliming. The character of Satan (played by a woman for all intents and purposes) wanders around in the different scenes, seen by no one but Jesus, eternally present. The part of Christianity that Gibson belongs to believes that, simply put, Jesus was the bait with which Satan was defeated. Satan thought that he was winning, driving people to kill the son of God, but when Jesus was dead Satan realized he had lost, that because Jesus died for the sins of mankind he would never have much power over them again. This is illustrated beautifully in the movie. There is also the theory of the angry god, the god that must take all his rage out on his son to be able to forgive mankind, thus Jesus inhuman suffering. I would assume Gibson believes this also, otherwise how would he justify the sheer amount of violence. Then there is the belief in the strong connection between Jesus and Maria, that the holy mother would have shared some supernatural bond with him, a belief especially nurtured in the Catholic church. The portrayal of Judas is also interesting, with his regret and eventual madness, as opposed to the other theory of Jesus having his betray him to bring about the passion and his release from his human body.
Artistically, it's rather well thought out. The set is beautiful, costumes feel natural. Some things feel exaggerated, such as weather effects and a lot of slow-motion shots. And for some reason I'm bothered by the fact that Jesus is so handsome. It makes me think of animal rights and the fact that some people only think we should save the cute animals and forget the rest. Anyway. The movie begins in the garden where Jesus is betrayed by Judas, where we also see Satan for the first time, and "necessary information" is then given as flashbacks along the way. There is a specifially fantastic sequence when Jesus is standing on the hill where they will nail him to the cross. The screen cuts to when Jesus was having dinner with his apprentices, where a small package is carried to the table, and the cloth wrapping thrown aside to reveal the bread. In the next moment you see the soldiers tear the clothes off Jesus' body.
Some have complained about the fact that they speak Arameic, the language that Jesus was supposed to have spoken. I thought it was a detail that greatly added to the realism, which is needed, since the reasonable part of my mind whines about some things that feel wrong, such as how could Jesus possible carry the damned cross when the other guy who comes in, who hasn't had the skin whipped from his body, can hardly walk with it. Then there is clear antisemitism here and there. Rivalery between Christianity and Judism may be unavoidable, but if Gibson want people to take him seriously, he may need to take them seriously. I doubt Jesus said anything about jews being bad.
As for the violence, I can't help but wonder how possible it is, how much a real human being could take. And also whether it is a part of the legend that Jesus could take much more than anyone else. Wasn't he supposed to be human also? The only part I couldn't bear to watch was when they actually nailed him to the cross. More the sound than the imagery, I imagine.
All in all, worth watching if you're interested in the religious aspects, and I believe more to be seen as symbolic than litteral, even if Gibson probably wouldn't agree.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Blame society
It feels the only thing I say when someone says a name, in class, in friendly circles, on tv, is who? In a way I begin to see the reasons for learning those extra words in the vocabulary, those silly four numbers, and those famous meaningless names, that my mind seem to dismiss as unimportant. If I am to learn them, though, I will have to make an effort out of the ordinary, and it will have to be constantly renewed. Much like my dedication to working out, actually; I see the necessarity, but fail the motivation.
I love Kingdom of Heaven. For many, many, many reasons. Was love that "simple" back in time? (Emotionally, I mean, of course. Romeo and Juliet had simple love, even if it wasn't easy.) It seems today, with individuality, spirituality, career and equality, and all that political correctness and mind-washing media, falling in love is more complicated, delicate and difficult to arrange than a billion dollar transaction between russian mafia and the Triad. Then again, am I only blaming society for my own faults? That is, after all, so much easier.
I love Kingdom of Heaven. For many, many, many reasons. Was love that "simple" back in time? (Emotionally, I mean, of course. Romeo and Juliet had simple love, even if it wasn't easy.) It seems today, with individuality, spirituality, career and equality, and all that political correctness and mind-washing media, falling in love is more complicated, delicate and difficult to arrange than a billion dollar transaction between russian mafia and the Triad. Then again, am I only blaming society for my own faults? That is, after all, so much easier.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)