Woke up in a horrible mood today. Wonder how those things work, those days that you've somehow decided for one emotion from waking up to going to bed, for no apparant reason. It's like laughing to make yourself happy or acting scared to become scared.
There's a manga/anime called Death Note. Awesome. Anyway, in part of it the main character makes sure he loses memory of everything he's done that far in the story, so that he can lie believably and not get caught. But the point of his plan is that he will regain his memory later on. He doesn't know that will happen. He doesn't even know if he'll still want the same things. But he has such faith in himself, he goes through with it.
These two things connect as follows: if you can manipulate so well your own emotions, and yourself, if it is so easy to change yourself, how easy wouldn't it be for others to change you? I wonder all this often, yet at the same time I have the feeling of that it's not true; that you, that I, would still remain no matter what. I believe in DNA, not environment. I believe in self, regardless of circumstances. "I" am as much a fluid concept as it is absolutely set in stone. The world exists to me only because I believe in it. And you can take the world from me, but I will still remain.
My virtue will be Faith.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
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2 comments:
Someday I want to have a discussion about that. Mostly because I think the opposite - without people, I am nothing. But I would like someone to prove me wrong.
Hm, I would like to be the one to prove your wrong too, actually. But in this case I could put up as many arguments as there are stars in the sky; there is no final evidence. In the end, all I have that proves this theory is my own faith in it, just like some people believe in God. Maybe that's just what you need, but I don't know how to convince people of faiths.
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